If you have reached that point in your life where you know you need genuine and profound relationships that add real substance to your life, this is for you!
You’d better know upfront that it is going to take a clear decision not to settle for anything less than relationships that are so good that they sizzle!
For example, marriages get into trouble when either partner looks to the other one to “complete” them, or to make them happy. Don’t tolerate that kind of pressure from another person, and don’t put the burden for what you want in life on another person. You will end up disappointed and angry if you place unrealistic expectations of one another.
As a single woman, maybe you are looking for a man with money – well don’t you know that the men of substance are also looking for a woman with money?
As a single man, maybe you are seeking a woman who prays and knows the Word. Has it occurred to you that she will be on the lookout for a man who knows the Word even better than she does?
Instead of finding Mr or Mrs Right, make your focus to BECOME Mr or Mrs Right.
Spend time working on yourself. Don’t waste time with half-hearted relationships that don’t mean anything.
Ladies, the day you decide that you are worthy of a whole man to yourself, is the day that you stop settling for being someone’s spare rib. All of Heaven will back your decision and bring you a man of honor. Take note, however, that in spotting a man, you must learn to look for potential, and not for someone who is ready made. It will be your privilege to bring the king out in Him. He will want to do better and be better just because he is standing next to a good woman.
Men, the day you decide to commit to one woman and give yourself wholly to her, is the day you stop being a boy. If you know that you don’t have the gift of celibacy, find someone with whom you can build a life. Don’t tell me that you are now 40 and no one has ever caught your eye! It’s time to overcome the fear and draw on God. Real men commit. You have to declare, “I am anointed to take care of my woman, and to be the healing balm that she needs for any issue that is on her life.”
It will be your privilege to wash her with your words of love, affirmation and strength, to speak the Word of God to her, and to provide for her the security that she needs to flourish and grow as a person.
One word of caution though, gentlemen. Don’t choose a woman who is universally disliked by other women. She may tell you that they are jealous of her, or that they’re not in her league, but beware! There are reasons why other women don’t want to be around her.
Ladies, if you don’t know how to choose a man of honor, apply these basic standards from the life of Adam:
God created the first man, Adam, to live in His own presence. Even before the fall, God gave Adam work to do. He also communed with him and walked and talked with him in the garden.
So, if a man doesn’t like the presence of God, can’t keep a job and has no desire for the Word of God, it’s not a real man that you are getting; it is a bag of bills!
Having said that, you should know that there are no WRONG choices when picking someone to marry; there are simply good choices and poor choices. If you make a poor choice, it will take more work to build a life together, but it can still be done. A key will be to accept the person you have chosen and to lay to rest the fact that they are not immediately all that you want. Don’t yield to the temptation to manipulate and play games to control and get your own way. The way we do things as believers is to be so good to them that it blows their mind; your excellent treatment of them will shame them into wanting to be better.
Father, I know that you are able to make me rich in significant relationships, and you are the one who will make me what I need to be to maximize them. Give me the wisdom I need to choose rightly, to discern carefully and to be a blessing. Let today be the day when you start to surround me with others who are going somewhere, and who share my passion and sense of purpose. Thank you Lord!