When God plants you in a church family, He also provides the relationships you need in that place to go to the next level in your life.
So how can you discern God’s leading and choose wisely?
Make a decision to build a life that is full of authentic people only. If right now you are surrounded by fake, superficial people who are all about what it looks like, then check yourself. Duplicitous people can’t bear to be around authentic people.
In understanding any person, you have first to discern their interests and reasons. Learn to listen to the philosophy behind the words. What does this person truly think and value?
Primary motivations are not always apparent. If you want to discern the character of a person, check out those who are closest to them and endorse them long term. How they last through a storm will also give you valuable insight into their character. Track record is far more telling than promises people make.
Authentic relationship comes at a price; that price is vulnerability. Only people who say what they mean and mean what they say can build real relationships with others.
When you love people you empower them to hurt you, so make sure you distinguish between those that are genuinely for you and those whose interests you advance, or you may invest yourself wrongly.
The agenda of your real friends is your well being. Relationships driven by money or any transactional exchange cannot be based on genuine affection or intimacy.
It takes courage and faith to open up to someone.
Hold back with a person who is uneasy with your emotions and only open your heart completely to those who can handle the worst and the best of you without diminishing who you are.
People are just as important in your life as you choose to make them, so don’t let yourself get hooked up on one individual where it just isn’t working. It will consume your emotional energy and limit other possibilities.
Sometimes you have to accept that certain people don’t want you in their lives any more and it doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with you. Don’t stay around getting hurt; move on! God has better things for you.
Praying for you that your life will be filled with people whose love and friendship cause you to forget the hurts of the past and who take you forward into your destiny.