Great relationships built on strength don’t just happen. We must not make the mistake of over-spiritualizing how we build relationship. We cannot push the responsibility for our choices onto God. He never forces us into any relationship.
Since it is our choice we must investigate before we commit. Don’t be in too much hurry.
In dating, people put their best foot forward. You will not marry the person you date since once you get home together, who you really are comes out.
You had better have done your homework, getting prepared for this moment, since there is only one thing worse than being lonely and that is being married to a nincompoop!
Use this checklist to ask yourself questions in preparation before you say, “I do.” Make sure you can live with your answers.
- What do I appreciate the most about this person and why? Be specific.
- What do I dislike and can I live with it. There will be things you dislike!
- What is the biggest change I will have to make and is he worth it?
- What concerns me the most about marrying this person? Every relationship will cause you come concerns. Identify them and decide is you can have faith for them.
- What is the biggest change I will have to make with my family of origin when I marry this person?
- What is it that annoys me the most about this person? If you don’t know you haven’t been real with each other yet. Is it too much or can I deal with it?
- Who is he closest to in my family? If none of your family gets on with him, we need to ask why. Don’t lose your family for someone who hasn’t put a ring on your finger yet. If your family can’t stand him, ask why.
- In my family who is the person he doesn’t get on with. If it is the crazy one, never mind, but if it is your nearest and dearest you have a problem.
- What is the most difficult subject for us to talk about? His ex, his money, her mother, her children – what causes sparks to fly?
- What is our biggest asset together? What can I do together that I can’t do on my own? If there is nothing, this is not the one for you.